Slightly busy day & quite tired

    Well due to a slightly busy day...it went pretty well. Had youth group tonight & that went really well. Being a worship leader is great. It is so fulfilling I love it. Tonight as I was singing I just felt the presence of God. Sometimes it is really difficult for me to worship because I tend to focus on the dynamics  & the notes of the music, but it is nice when you have someone in the band playing the guitar who knows what they are doing it makes it much easier (Brian you are awesome!!) & I think that God knows that about me it liked to est me sometimes. It's not abut that it sounds like all that matters is that we are praising our God, & anything to Hi is beautiful to Him. But all in all it was lovely. God is truly wonderful. 
It has been a really rough month, 2 months, ok well year, & last year as well. God has just taught me through all of the trials that I have been through  are still in it seems , that it makes you stronger & a better person. I feel like I have climbed mountains, & am still climbing them. I know that He never gives you more than you can handle, but it is still very difficult to remember that.  I know I am guilty as well, but it just seems like everyone clings on to the world instead of clinging unto God in their most difficult times of trial. I know that         
    I have seen myself do that a lot. but my prayer is that we don't cling unto the the things of this world but to God our Rock, our strong hold. If it was not for God I would no be here honestly. 
    Ok, so I have this dream that not many people know about me, & it is something that not many people would guess...& I don't know if this is good or bad haha! but anyway my dream is to go to a foreign Country & to work in an orphanage & help people, kids, love them & show them true, genuine love that they have never been shown before. I love children so much,  I mean so much, to the point that it literally kills me inside ya know? It really breaks my heart when I hear stories abut children that have no one, & feel like that they have no one. I am very sensitive to that I mean I am a sensitive person in general, but I am very sensitive to the topic of children. It is so crucial for them to have someone to value them. It helps make who they are going to become. I feel like that if  a child does not have that love that they are more likely to turn out not so great in the world and feel completely lost  be completely broken by the time they reach adulthood. I guess what I am trying to say is that I want to e that role model of love, & care to a child that has no one because honestly there are so many, & so I pray that God will listen to my heart, & that I listen to Go d& go where He wants me to. Lead me in the right direction. I know He has a plan...I just am not sure what that is quite yet...